Once upon a time I had a white stroke. I also had a multi-page to-do list. I was given very specific inner instructions on how to deal with this habit. I was shown, "Look at your list ONCE, every morning, then turn the thing face down and do not, under any circumstances, look again, today. I could not read at the time, only with one eye shut, and could not use my computer, so my level of disability at that time was Source's ally.

The first week, I managed, purely from physical exhaustion. {yes, I taught a class 7 days after the event, propped up in bed on pillows. Idiocy much?} The second week, two items fell off the list, by way of not being accomplished. Mental panic ensued. And the, Source popped in again with, "Look again." Not the greatest advice, given I was literally seeing triple. I looked, and, as it happened, one item, had I completed it, would have had to be re-done due to changing circumstances. The other was simply irrelevant. By following only the inner nudges, and not my tyrannical, self-punishing list, what needed to be done, was done. And, I was able to rest, if not relax, and heal.

My 'list' now takes other forms, and I honor Source's guidance by listening to the nudges and following them. I can only share that it works. Your way will be your own. All self-punishing habits and agendas aside. ;)

Great piece, Julia.